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Wednesday, September 10, 2003 ISSUE #289

Will Rogers for Governor: Week 5

# 289, Sept. 10, 2003

COLUMBUS: Today, I am announcing my campaign Slogan. It may not be as memorable as the Lt. Governor's slogan, "Bustamante or Bust!" And it won't stand out quite like the one for Mary Carey campaigning in a bikini, "Bust!"

But I will stand by my slogan, same as in 1928. Here it is:

"IF ELECTED I ABSOLUTELY AND POSITIVELY AGREE TO RESIGN. That's my only Campaign pledge, or Slogan, ELECT ROGERS AND HE WILL RESIGN. That's offering the (state) more than any Candidate ever offered it in the entire History of its existence."

Peter Ueberroth did me one better. He resigned before being elected.

I'm getting off this California campaign trail, at least for a while. Next week I'll dig up something entertaining for the other 49 states, and maybe the rest of the world. The Texas Democrats are back in Austin, and Congress is back in town, except the ones running for President. There's so many it's harder to get a quorum in Washington than in Texas.

Historic quotes from Will Rogers: (1928, Life magazine, with only a couple of changes.)

The process is called a "political campaign." It involves an incalculable amount of energy, expense, heartache, boredom and general nuisance. It is, from beginning to end, a colossal waste of time, for those actively engaged in it and for those who have to read about it in the newspapers and listen to it over the radio.

I believe that the candidates would have all been better off if they had pulled a (Calvin) Coolidge and got down in their shell and not come out till the votes were counted, for the less a voter knows about you the longer he is liable to vote for you.

My religion, foreign travel, or style of hat has never even been referred to. No attempt has been made to cash in on any Sex Appeal I may unconsciously possess. So I may be defeated on election day, but if I am I can retire as a Gentleman and NOT a politician.

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