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Monday, November 13, 2006 ISSUE #432
 

Democrats beat the Republicans, but lose to Football

#432, November 13, 2006

COLUMBUS: The election is over. Our officials were practically forced to get it over with; the candidates for 2008 were beating on the door.

I voted, along with 40 percent of the rest of you. That means sixty percent don't seem to care what shape the country is in, which kinda helps explain the shape the country is in.

I felt kinda foolish at the polls. The Congressional seat that appeared on the voting machine was not the one I thought we were in. I guess while my head was turned they moved the district border on me. For months I had been watching the wrong negative ads.

Ohio voted to turn the whole state over to the Democrats. But considering the state it's in, I ain't so sure they should take it. The new Governor, Ted Strickland, is optimistic. He spent the last dozen or so years in Congress, and says he will apply the same shrewd management skills in Ohio that he learned in Washington.

Hardly anyone in Ohio even noticed the election, they are so focused on football. Around the country, folks think the college championship game will be played January 8 in Arizona. But in Ohio, they know the real game for number one is this Saturday in Columbus. Both Michigan and Ohio State say any game in January will only be a preliminary warm-up for next season.

Big changes in Washington. Secretary Rumsfeld is out, and the House went to the Democrats just as the polls, and history, had predicted. The Senate is more evenly split, with 51 that are running for President and 49 that ain't. To get a quorum for a Senate vote they'll have to convene in New Hampshire.

Governor Tom Vislack of Iowa was first to announce he is running for President. He wants Iowa to pledge all their votes to him and discourage other candidates from ever setting up housekeeping in Des Moines. But these Iowa voters are too smart for that. They like their governor, but they don't want to cut off the flow of the millions of dollars the candidates will spend. After corn, presidential politics is Iowa's number one revenue source.

We just passed Veterans Day, Thanksgiving Day is two weeks off, but if you're ready to go Christmas shopping, Wal-Mart says come on in. Some of these big stores treat December 25 as just another Holiday, but Sam Walton's folks know their customers, and by golly their customers want to buy Christmas presents, not holiday gifts. Of course Wal-Mart says you're welcome to give the gifts for Hanukkah or Kwanza or even Thanksgiving, but don't get upset when they wish you a Merry Christmas as you enter the store.

Historic quotes from Will Rogers:

"I like to make little jokes and kid about the Senators. They are a kind of a never ending source of amusement, amazement, and Discouragement. But the Rascals, when you meet 'em face to face and know 'em, they are mighty nice fellows. It must be something in the office that makes 'em so ornery sometimes. When you see what they do officially you want to shoot 'em, but when one looks at you and grins so innocently, why you kinder want to kiss him." WA #345, August 4, 1929

"Politics is the best show in America. I love animals and I love politicians. I like to watch both of 'em at play, either back home in their native state, or after they've been captured and sent to a zoo, or to Washington." (Undated)


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